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Just a few days ago, I learned that one of my exes passed away back in January. I had no idea, and I'm still not sure exactly how to process that information. Perhaps putting my thoughts down in this entry will be helpful.
We had an on-and-off history that actually went back to grade school, when she sat behind me in 6th grade, before she moved to another school district. We ended up going to college together; though we never had any classes together, we were both at the same community college at the same time and crossed paths a bit.
Having reconnected on MySpace, we actually started dating in 2006. It was great for awhile - really, my first relationship of any real substance - but ended abruptly when personal reasons led to her suddenly moving to Florida.
Nearly a decade later she had moved back to New York and contacted me via Facebook. It took me a little while to be ready to respond, but when I finally did we agreed to meet up and for a brief time seemed to pick up where we left off. But it burned out quickly and ended with - at least for me; hopefully for her - a sense of closure that we hadn't had the first time around. Maybe, ultimately, that's what was needed. I hadn't had contact with her since then.
She was the kind of person who could never stay in one place for very long, both physically and metaphorically, and that may have been the main thing that doomed us. She also had personal issues in her past that carried baggage, and I truly hope that none of that is what ultimately led to her passing. 38 is certainly no age to go.
We had a somewhat tumultuous history that saw us involved in each other's lives in various ways and at various points over the course of two decades or so, and while I hadn't had contact with her in several years and had no plans to - indeed, I didn't know she was gone until nearly six months later - during my time with her I learned a lot about myself, my wants and needs and how to handle relationships. Certainly we made mistakes, but no matter how things ended, we did have some good times along the way. Looking back from the stable place I now find myself, for all of that I am truly grateful.
Thank you and rest easy, Amie.
We had an on-and-off history that actually went back to grade school, when she sat behind me in 6th grade, before she moved to another school district. We ended up going to college together; though we never had any classes together, we were both at the same community college at the same time and crossed paths a bit.
Having reconnected on MySpace, we actually started dating in 2006. It was great for awhile - really, my first relationship of any real substance - but ended abruptly when personal reasons led to her suddenly moving to Florida.
Nearly a decade later she had moved back to New York and contacted me via Facebook. It took me a little while to be ready to respond, but when I finally did we agreed to meet up and for a brief time seemed to pick up where we left off. But it burned out quickly and ended with - at least for me; hopefully for her - a sense of closure that we hadn't had the first time around. Maybe, ultimately, that's what was needed. I hadn't had contact with her since then.
She was the kind of person who could never stay in one place for very long, both physically and metaphorically, and that may have been the main thing that doomed us. She also had personal issues in her past that carried baggage, and I truly hope that none of that is what ultimately led to her passing. 38 is certainly no age to go.
We had a somewhat tumultuous history that saw us involved in each other's lives in various ways and at various points over the course of two decades or so, and while I hadn't had contact with her in several years and had no plans to - indeed, I didn't know she was gone until nearly six months later - during my time with her I learned a lot about myself, my wants and needs and how to handle relationships. Certainly we made mistakes, but no matter how things ended, we did have some good times along the way. Looking back from the stable place I now find myself, for all of that I am truly grateful.
Thank you and rest easy, Amie.
